Advice from our Mental Health & Counseling department.
Written by Jessenia Pagan CCC's Behavioral Health Program Manager
Being in a relationship shouldn't mean feeling scared, controlled, or disrespected. If you're experiencing dating violence, know this: you're not alone, and there is help available.
Here are some things you can do:
Recognize the Signs:
Ten Red flags to look out for
Excessive jealousy or possessiveness: Your partner constantly checks your phone, accuses you of flirting, or isolates you from friends.
Controlling behavior: They dictate your clothes, who you see, or even what you post online.
Put-downs and insults: They constantly criticize your appearance, intelligence, or even your friends and family.
Threats and intimidation: They threaten to hurt themselves or others if you break up or disagree with them.
Unwanted physical contact: Hitting, pushing, grabbing, or any other physical touch you don't consent to is abuse.
Pressure to send nudes or engage in sexual activity: You have the right to say no, and no means NO!
Monitoring your online activity: They track your location, demand your passwords, or stalk you on social media.
Guilt-tripping and manipulation: They use emotional tactics to make you feel responsible for their behavior.
Sudden changes in behavior: You become withdrawn, anxious, or show signs of depression due to the relationship.
Feeling afraid of your partner: Your gut tells you something's wrong, and you're afraid of how they might react.
Reach out for Help
Talk to a trusted adult: Tell a parent, teacher, counselor, or another trusted adult what's happening.
Call a hotline:
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
Love is Respect: 1-866-331-9474
The National Teen Dating Violence Hotline: 1-800-788-3224
Text "START" to 741741: Connect with a Crisis Counselor 24/7.
Visit a website:
Love is Respect: https://www.loveisrespect.org/
The National Domestic Violence Hotline: https://www.thehotline.org
Develop a Safety Plan
Identify safe places to go if you feel unsafe at home or with your partner.
Memorize important phone numbers (hotlines, trusted adults).
Keep a charged phone with you at all times.
Pack a bag with essentials in case you need to leave quickly.
Know your school's safety procedures and escape routes.
Remember:
It's not your fault. You deserve to be treated with respect, no matter what.
You're not alone. Many teens experience dating violence, and there's help available.
You have the right to safety. Don't be afraid to reach out for help.
For more information
Visit our Counseling Services Page
Call 804.545.5907 for CCC counseling
Read: How to Start the Conversation about Teen Dating Violence